Come back internasjonal stjoedent, we miss joe, we riellie do

I bring an belangrijke message from the joeniversity to all international stjoedents: please come back. For jeers, our friendsjip was good: joe pay us monnie, and joe can kom to the Netherlands. But no house! No, joe regel self a house, or a kamer. House is not ons problem.

But suddenlie, people started to compleen about our friendsjip; they said wie treated you bad! Okay, meebie we did, a little, but in Dutsj we say ‘zand erover’, wie can just start again, reit?

Just leik the televisjon show Friends, with Rachel and Ross. They broke up, but den they keem bek together. Joe kan be our Ross, or our Rachel. End good, all good.

In Dutsj we say ‘zand erover’, wie can just start again, reit?

Den der are also stories about finansjial problems. Dat may be a little bit troe. Whoopsie daisy! Or, in Dutch: oepsiefloepsie. We ran intoe some problems; enerdzjie, higher salaries, but also: joe.

Of course, joe are not the onlie reason for the finansjal problems. But joe can bie part of our solution! Oh, but especiallie if joe are not from the EU.

And wie hef another problem: our internasjional position. Not alleen of the joeniversity, but ook of the hele regio of Groningen. Less students (and espesjially internationals), will be bad for the joeniversity; less quality of research and education. But ook the regio of Groningen: we will krimp.

We also like your monnie, but dat is not important. Okay, maybie a little

Joe see how it happened: with our recruiting we gingen ‘even dimmen’. Not so mutsj internationals anniemore. And that happened. Almost nijn procent less, in the bachelor. Dat was a bit painful for us.

Joe see, wie riellie like joe! Wie thought wie could live wifout joe. But our break-up still hurts, and secretly, wie still like joe. Of kors, we also like your monnie, but dat is not important. Okay, maybie a little.

Annieway, we miss joe. We riellie do. We miss joe even moor when joe are not from Europe. Are you from Asia? Or America? Just kom to Groningen! It is a nice city. And jes, joe may pay higher tuition fees. But dat is what you do for friends, right? Joe help mie, and I help joe.

Oh, joe have a kwestion? Oh jes, een kamer? Een room? We can not offer joe dat. No dat, is still your own probleem. 

BAUKE VAN DER KOOIJ

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