Following your partner

When brings you to Groningen

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Following your partner

When brings you to Groningen

01-1 intro

You’re on a sunny beach in Australia, toes in the sand. Out of the blue, your wife tells you she’s been offered her dream job – in Groningen. What the hell, you say: let’s go.

You’re a student, planning to travel the world once you graduate. But then you fall in love and find yourself planning to stay put – in Groningen.

People come to this city from all over the world to study and to teach. But what is life like for those who come here, or decide to stay, for love?

By Andriana Boyrikova
02-1

Philip & Erin

Sometimes, love means sacrifice

02-2

Struggling for a job

In 2012, Philip Monsbourgh and his wife Erin Wilson had no doubt that their future together was bright. She had just been appointed Director of the Centre for Religion, Conflict, and Public Domain at the University of Groningen – a once in a lifetime job.

Philip, a product design engineer, would also have to find work in Groningen. ‘But colleagues in Australia recommended the place for job opportunities’, he recalls. He was optimistic, he says. Erin was the one with a very specialised skill set. ‘Mine is much more general and adaptable.’

But to his surprise, Philip struggled for a year and a half to find work. And even though the university promised to support spouses professionally ‘they really did not understand what exactly I did. They did not even have a simple list with the job agencies I could try!’

In the end, Philip established himself as a freelancer in 3D printing and landed a contract job at High Tech Campus in Eindhoven. He didn’t come home until very late on Friday nights. ‘It is pretty shitty in your marriage when you see each other two times a week’, Philips recollects. ‘It was ridiculous!’ Erin says. ‘We did not have much of a social life during this period because on weekends we wanted to spend time with each other.’

Eventually Philip got a job in Drachten, a 30-minute commute from Groningen. ‘This is the reality of the north – one person has a local job and the partner generally has to travel.’

Living halfway around the world has some disadvantages. ’My mother is quite elderly. Once she had a severe reaction to the flu and was taken to the hospital in coma. Even if she passed away, I would not have been able to be there on time,’ Philip sighs. ‘You really feel the distance at those times.’

3-1

Tanaya & Swarnodeep

Sometimes, love means starting over

3-2

Flight from a post-Brexit UK

Dutch kids are said to be the happiest in the world. So when Tanaya Ganguly’s husband Swarnodeep was offered an assistant professor position in Belfast, he turned it down and took a position at the Faculty of Economics and Business at the University of Groningen instead. No matter what, they wanted to leave: life in post-Brexit UK was no good anymore. They wanted better for their two-year-old son.

The family lived in the UK for four years, but after the referendum things started going in the wrong direction, Tanaya says. ‘One could hear a lot of racial comments. Or see that kind of look – you are immigrants, you do not belong here.’

And so they set their sights on Holland. ‘We wanted to give our kid a good, safe environment and now we see we were right, this is a very good place with nice people’, Tanaya says.

However, Tanaya faces challenges in her new life in Groningen: ‘If I want a job, I have to be proficient in Dutch. So I have to learn the language as quickly as possible.’ She also admits she is struggling with cycling in Groningen’s busy bike lanes. Still, she is determined to learn to ride her bike further than the front yard of her house.

Even so, Groningen has turned out to be everything the family hoped for. ‘My husband wanted to get a good opportunity at a good university and now he has it at UG. I have also joined the Dual Career Support and I want to get a job through it. I am happy here.’

4-1

Tatiana & Santiago

Sometimes, love means raising a baby on your own

4-2

A crazy roller coaster

The last few years have been a crazy roller coaster ride for Tatiana Coba. Not only did she get her Master’s degree, but she also gave birth and moved from Ecuador to Groningen – twice.

Tatiana studied communication at Universidad San Francisco de Quito, while her husband, Santiago, worked in renewable energy. But then Santiago received a scholarship for a PhD and started searching for a university. Tatiana was not going to let him go alone, so they found a school where she could also get a Master’s degree. ‘It is rare to find a university which can suit both of us. This is how we chose the University of Groningen – it has such a diverse range of studies.’

In 2015, they moved to Groningen. Tatiana did a Master’s degree program in Journalism. When she got pregnant, the couple decided to move back to Ecuador. ‘I was a bit depressed and did not feel like home here.’

But Santiago’s new PhD supervisor wanted him to finish his work in Groningen. So the family got on a plane, again – this time, with an eight-month-old baby. ‘I was very sad to come back. It took me a long time to accept it,’ Tatiana recollects. ‘I did not know how the Dutch healthcare system worked – what if my baby got sick and I did not know how to bring her to the doctor?’

Now, however, Tatiana says the decision has really helped her grow. ‘This whole experience has bonded me a lot with my husband. Although I miss my family a lot, here we can decide what is best for our kid on our own. It is like the three of us against the world.’

5-1

Elisa & Jonatans

Sometimes, love means settling down

05-2

Pinned down for love

Elisa Kephart never planned to come to Groningen. Neither did she plan to stay. But even though she completed her Bachelor’s degree in arts, culture, and media at the University of Groningen over a year ago, she won’t be leaving any time soon.

Elisa’s initial plan was to do her studies in Ireland, but those plans fell through. So she searched for other opportunities in Europe and the US. ‘Then I found the University of Groningen. Coming here was very random’, she laughs.

After graduation and while juggling multiple part-time jobs, Elisa met her boyfriend Jonatans, from Spain. ‘This has turned into a very fast-paced relationship. There was this instant connection where you feel really comfortable together from the very beginning.’

But there is a fly in the ointment. Elisa is a traveller at heart. After she left her home in Japan she lived in Ireland and France, driven by her mentality that she can move anywhere she wants. So she feels the wanderlust pull from time to time: ‘I do have this impulsive feeling sometimes – like I am done with this place and maybe now I can go to Bulgaria.’

Even so, for now she is happy to ‘stick in only one city’. And she feels no regrets. ‘I do not see staying here in a negative way. I am able to stay with the person I love.’

And what if Japan and Spain are not destined to last in Groningen? Elisa laughs: ‘Jonatans is a very strong addition as to why I am here, so if we broke up… I do not know! I guess it will be time to go to a new place.’

mobile versie
Say you live in Australia. And suddenly your wife tells you she has found a job in Groningen. But you love her, so you follow her. Or you are a student planning just to do a bachelor’s program at the UG and then explore the world. Until you find love and decide to stay. What does it mean to give up your country and friends, all for love?
Text and photos by Andriana Boyrikova

Philip & Erin

Struggling for a job

Philip Monsbourgh and his wife Erin Wilson had no doubts that a bright future was awaiting them when in 2012 she was appointed associate professor Politics and Religion at the University of Groningen – a big chance for her, because she had just finished her PhD.

Of course, Philip who is a product design engineer, would have to find a job for himself. ‘But colleagues in Australia who have been here recommended the place for job opportunities’, he recalls. Also, it was Erin who had a very specialised skill set. ‘Mine is much more general and adaptable.’

Unfortunately, Philip struggled for a year and a half. And even though the university had assured him that it supported spouses professionally ‘they really did not understand what exactly I did. They did not even have a simple list with the job agencies I could try!’

In the end, Philip established himself as a freelancer in 3D printing which landed him a contract job at High Tech Campus, Eindhoven. He would be back home at 10 on Friday night. ‘It is pretty shitty in your marriage when you see each other two times a week’, Philips recollects. ‘It was ridiculous! We did not have much of a social life during this period because on weekends we wanted to spend time with each other’, Erin adds.

Eventually Philip got a job in Drachten, a 30-minute commute from Groningen. ‘This is the reality of the north – one person has a local job and the partner generally has to travel.’

Still, living halfway around the world has its disadvantages. ’My mother is quite elderly. Once she had a severe reaction to the flu and was taken to the hospital in coma. Even if she passed away, I would not have been able to be there on time,’ Philip sighs. ‘You really feel the distance at those times.’

Tanaya & Swarnodeep

Flight from a post-Brexit UK

Dutch kids are said to be the happiest in the world. So when Tanaya Ganguly’s husband – Swarnodeep was offered an assistant professor position in Belfast, he turned it down and took a position at the Faculty of Economics and Business at the University of Groningen instead. Life in post-Brexit UK was no good anymore for their two-year-old son, they felt.

The family lived in the UK for four years but now things are not going in the right direction, according to them. ‘One could hear a lot of racial comments. Or see that kind of look – you are immigrants, you do not belong here.’

And so they chose Holland. ‘We wanted to give our kid a good and save environment and now we see we were right, this is a very good place with nice people’, Tanaya says.

However, Tanaya faces challenges in her new life in Groningen: ‘If I want a job, I have to be proficient in Dutch. So I have to learn the language as quickly as possible.’ She also admits she is struggling with cycling in Groningen’s busy bike lanes. Still, she is determined to learn to ride her bike further than the front yard of her house.

Yet, Groningen has turned out to be everything the family hoped for. ‘My husband wanted to get a good opportunity at a good university and now he has it at UG. I have also joined the Dual Career Support and I want to get a job through it. I am happy here.’

Tatiana & Santiago

A crazy roller coaster

Life with her husband Santiago has been a crazy roller coaster ride for Tatiana Coba in the last few years. Not only did she get her Master’s degree, but also gave birth and moved from Ecuador to Groningen. Twice.

Tatiana studied communication at Universidad San Francisco de Quito, while her husband was trying to progress his career in renewable energy. But then, Santiago received a scholarship for a PhD and started searching for a place where to do it. Tatiana was not going to let him go alone and took up looking for a university where she could get her master’s degree. ‘It is rare to find a university which can suit both of us. This is how we chose the University of Groningen – it has such a diverse range of studies.’

And so, in 2015, they moved to Groningen. Tatiana did a Master’s degree program in Journalism but then she got pregnant and the couple decided to move back to Ecuador. ‘I was a bit depressed and did not feel like home here.’

Unfortunately, Santiago got a new PhD supervisor who wanted him to finish his work here. And the family got on the plane again. This time, with their eight-month-old baby. ‘I was very sad to come back. It took me a long time to accept it,’ Tatiana recollects. ‘I did not know how the Dutch healthcare system worked – what if my baby got sick and I did not know how to bring her to the doctor?’

Now, however, Tatiana says it really helped her grow. ‘This whole experience has bonded me a lot with my husband. Although I miss my family a lot, here we can decide what is best for our kid on our own. It is like the three of us against the world.’

Elisa & Jonatans

Pinned down for love

Elisa Kephart never planned to come to Groningen. Neither did she plan to stay. Still, she did a Bachelor’s degree in arts, culture, and media at the University of Groningen and although she graduated half a year ago, she has no intention to leave the city any time soon.

Elisa’s initial plan was to do her studies in Ireland. Alas, she was not admitted where she wanted so she searched for other opportunities in Europe and the US. ‘Then I found the University of Groningen. Coming here was very random’, she laughs.

It was after she graduated and while she was juggling with multiple part-time jobs that she met her boyfriend Jonatans from Spain. ‘This has turned into a very fast-paced relationship. There was this instant connection where you feel really comfortable together from the very beginning.’

But there is a fly in the ointment. Elisa is a traveller at heart. After she left her home in Japan she also lived in Ireland and France, always believing that the next place holds a new adventure. She feels the pull of her old wanderlust from time to time: ‘I do have this impulsive feeling sometimes – like I am done with this place and maybe now I can go to Bulgaria.’

Even so, for now she is happy to ‘stick in only one city’. And she feels no regrets. ‘I do not see staying here in a negative way. I am able to stay with the person I love.’

And what if Japan and Spain are not destined to last in Groningen? Elisa laughs: ‘Jonatans is a very strong addition as to why I am here, so if we broke up… I do not know! I guess it will be time to go to a new place.’

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